Now I was aware that our government was very secretive and all, but I really had no idea that some mad-scientist types working in some hidden White House laboratories had managed to create cold-fusion while also coming up with a way to produce instance hydrogen through the force of prayer. But if our great President suggests this, I'm sure it's so. The man surely wouldn't be telling a lie:
"Our nation is on the threshold of new energy technology that I think will startle the American people," Bush said. "We're on the edge of some amazing breakthroughs -- breakthroughs all aimed at enhancing our national security and our economic security and the quality of life of the folks who live here in the United States."
Great news, eh? I guess we can just use all the hydrocarbons we want. (Time to buy that new Hummer and stop driving around like a girly man!) When things get real bad, the White House scientists will wheel out their new inventions for the rest of us to see. I can't wait to see the shock and awe on the faces of all those uppity experts and professor types who keep telling us that no technical breakthroughs are around the corner.
(Hat tip to Tech Policy)